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EQ stands for Emotional Quotient. It refers to a person's ability to understand, use, and manage their emotions positively to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflict. In essence, it's about being emotionally intelligent.

Achieving emotional intelligence isn't necessarily hard and requires conscious effort and practice.

And like any skill, it takes time to develop.

According to experts, one of the simplest ways to improve one's EQ levels is to use a specific vocabulary that inspires others and elicits other positive emotional responses.

People with high emotional intelligence, in addition to incorporating some particular phrases into their vocabulary, also have some prohibitive ones that they seldom use because they are considered "toxic". If you want to improve your EQ, then maybe you should consider taking out of your vocabulary the following expressions:

"I'm sorry"

A word that, on the surface, seems emotionally intelligent, but in reality, it’s better to avoid. Instead of using “I’m sorry”, you can use the verb "apologize". Using this verb makes the apology more active and has more momentum. It means that you are trying to make amends for what you have caused while simply "apologizing" and accepting that you will do things you don't want to do in time.

"That reminds me..."

Using this phrase, you show your interlocutor that you do not understand them, have no empathy, and probably show them that you do not even listen to what they tell you. Instead, you just care about how to interrupt them to talk about yourself and about what you remembered while they spoke. Next time, even if their issue, situation, or problem reminds you of one of your experiences, try to control it and maybe recall it another time.

"You have no choice"

It is one of the least emotionally intelligent phrases because it implies two issues. The first is that this phrase is not actually truthful, as we all have more options than one in each situation, and the second problem is that you're using that phrase to steer the other person to do what you want. It's essentially dictating what they should do, taking away their right to choose.

“You're overreacting."

This dismissive phrase invalidates the other person's feelings and can escalate the situation. High-EQ individuals prioritize empathy and understanding, recognizing that everyone's emotional experiences are valid, and even if the other person’s feelings do not resonate with theirs, it doesn’t mean that they are not reasonable and for a good reason.

"I told you so..."

A, not-at-all-intelligent phrase that puts you in the center of attention and makes you look like a "bright omniscient" even though you may not have had such a purpose and intention. This phrase can be hurtful and condescending, as it focuses on past mistakes rather than finding solutions. High-EQ individuals aim to build positive relationships and avoid making others feel inferior so this is not a phrase included in their vocabulary.

"I know how you feel"

A phrase that has no trace of empathy. It's so cliché that it reveals a lack of understanding and compassion, and it's best to eliminate it from your vocabulary if you want to show the other person that you understand them and respect their feelings. Everyone is different, and each one of us, develop our feelings in a particular way, so knowing how someone feels, is practically impossible, even if you had the exact same experience.

"It's not difficult"

Although as a phrase, it is considered to be used to remove fear of something, it does not help the recipient much as it often has no realistic basis. The rule always has exceptions, so next time, it's best not to rush to tell someone that it's not hard to do something when they tell you they can't. Whether they can or not, highlighting the lack of difficulty could easily be perceived as undermining their skills and capabilities.

"I don't want to get into a fight, but..."

Using this phrase means you have lost the game of communication because it is like starting a conflict. Basically, you are saying to the other person that you are going to trigger them for a fight by saying something unpleasant/triggering/disrespectful, but you don’t want to take responsibility for their reaction. Emotionally intelligent people never use this phrase, and it is better not to say anything than to say something that will mark the beginning of a confrontation without substantial, valid arguments.