“I want to lose weight, but I can't,” “I'll be on a diet from Monday,” “I'll have to take care of my health, but I don’t have the time,” “I'll start getting my medication,” “I want to change jobs, but I cannot sit down and update my LinkedIn profile,” or replace this sentence with whatever you think you need to do.

If you recognize yourself in one of the above phrases, keep reading because it’s time you acknowledged that you lack self-discipline.

The bad news is that you have lost some time trying to do whatever you need/want/must do. The good news is that there are ways to escape this vicious cycle of doing nothing and build the discipline to move from where you are to where you want to be.

First things first, we need to define discipline and self-discipline. In essence, the big difference between those terms is that discipline is focused on the promise you've given to someone else, so someone else is looking at you and watching your steps. Sometimes, you're trying to be okay with that because it's the stress you feel when somebody is paying attention to you and your actions.

So, what is self-discipline? It is about doing what is right for you and what you've promised yourself, and nobody is watching apart from you.

Self-discipline is a part of self-leadership

If you don't have control over your life and you cannot discipline yourself, then how can you lead others?

According to numerous studies, self-disciplined people show significant levels of happiness and satisfaction compared to people who struggle to fulfill their obligations because they feel more productive and creative. They get out of their comfort zone since they are moving towards action, and they're not losing their time and thoughts on what could have happened in the past or what they could have done better; the only thing that they care about is how to succeed and how to move ahead with their lives.

Jim Rohn once said that self-discipline is the bridge between goals defined and goals accomplished. So, the only way to succeed, move forward, and do what you actually want to do in your life is to be self-disciplined.

If you think being self-disciplined is extremely hard and something you would never be able to achieve, believe me, it’s not; it’s more like following some simple rules but following them for an amount of time equivalent to not having to think about them anymore. Keep reading because I have the seven ways that have helped me build self-discipline and actually move forward with my life -personally and professionally.

Replace “I Have To” With “I Want To”

Ok, this is a great one -and it can be fun! If you tell yourself that you have to lose weight or you have to save money this month, then by default, you put yourself in a position where what you are going to do is either extremely dull or overly unpleasant, and it shows that you have to work hard for that and that someone has imposed and enforced that to you, but when you say “I want to lose weight” or “I want to go to save money this month,” you automatically get in the mood that you are motivated to go for it. So, next time you must do something, replace those two words and see the magic of your brain when you tell it the right words!

Manage Self-expectations

It's physically impossible to be exceptional in everything we are doing. Nobody is good at everything, so it is important to be self-aware and know where you are good and where you're not. Then, when you understand your sensitive spots, it will be easier for you to work for them and put them first on your to-want list because you don't want to be exposed; you want to do your job and move on with your goals. Don't start with the easy ones, aka the things you are good at; begin with the challenging ones because this is the only way to build self-discipline. For instance, if your sensitive spot is communications, then the first thing you should put on your “want list” is to communicate in any possible way with everyone; so, go on arrange meetings, call people instead of texting, have a chit-chat with the person waiting behind you on the line to grab a Starbucks… If you keep doing that, you will soon feel more comfortable talking to other people, and, at the same time, you will build discipline.

Avoid Distractions

Suppose you are about to work on a critical project or have a crucial deadline. You know that, but having your phone beside you will make you scroll. So, you lose a couple of hours of your life doomscrolling and end up late at night with no energy or motivation to finish your report. Take your phone and put it somewhere else. Remove it from where you are, restrict access to your phone for the next couple of hours until you progress with your work, and try not to go and touch it. Some phone apps can help you do that, but your loved ones can also be a helpful ally; that means take your phone and give it to you only when the time is right. Overall, try to do whatever you can to avoid distractions, temptations, or whatever keeps you away from your goals.

State your why

When you want to achieve a goal but don't feel disciplined enough, remember your why. For instance, if your goal is to lose weight, why do you want to do that? Reflect on what achieving this goal means for your life, how important it is, and what good it can bring; also think about the negative impact of not fulfilling it. If you know your why, then the motivation of being self-disciplined is going to be more accessible, and you are going to remember the reasons for taking away from yourself some quick pleasure, like sitting on the couch without doing anything instead of hitting the gym.

Schedule Your Time Accordingly

List all the actions and activities you must do to achieve your goals and go where you want to be; then add them to your calendar. If you want to go to the gym early in the morning, block the calendar so that this is the dedicated time. If you want to finish the report, block this time on the calendar so that this time is dedicated to that. Having a calendar will definitely help you take action. My colorful calendar is watching me every single day! However, what you need to pay attention to is to make your calendar as functional as you can so that your tasks are achievable. Don’t overload yourself every day, and don’t try to fit everything in one day. Trust me, if you keep doing this for a month, the calendar habit will become irreplaceable!

Change The Way You See Yourself

The way you look at yourself and the way you talk to yourself is fundamental. If you keep telling yourself that you cannot be self-disciplined, you cannot sit down and do what you must, or that you do not have what it takes to move forward, this becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, and you end up causing your beliefs to come true. Instead of this negative self-talk, try tomorrow to wake up and say, “I'm very disciplined, and I can do everything,” or “I can do whatever it takes to lose weight or to save money this month.” It may not work the first day, but after 10 days, if you keep motivating yourself like this and talking positively to yourself, believe me, this will get you the self-discipline you need.

Forgive Yourself

Self-discipline is not a sprint; it's a marathon. It's expected to be kept from being disciplined every day. This is a common motif for people who start a diet on Monday. Imagine going to the office while you're ready to begin your new nutritional plan, and then a colleague has their birthday, and they have brought candies. You eat one, and then you say, “you know what, I don't think I'm going to do that. I'm not capable of doing that”. And then you drop your diet. Let me tell you something: It's okay to make a slip. You need to forgive yourself and move forward to the rest of your diet day. If you want ice cream, it's okay; you can keep eating healthy after that. Do not slap yourself if you have a sleep, and do not feel that you failed in any way. Do not ruin what you have been building with your nutrition all this time for one time for 5 minutes that it took with this ice cream; it's okay; you deserve a moment of sleep, and you go back to your plan as you have scheduled it.

Self-discipline is something that you need to work on and keep trying to achieve. It's not something that comes with a magic wand, and boom, one day, you become self-disciplined. If you follow the above tricks, within a month, you'll be able to say that you have put the foundation for a more self-disciplined life and resulting success.