If I want to be completely frank with myself, I have always wanted to work and earn money so that I could buy whatever I wanted without having to panic at the end of the month, looking at my bank statement. And I love buying new things, for me, my home, even my family and friends. It’s a little bliss every time I open a package or watch my loved ones opening a gift. For so long, that was my driving force. Work hard, earn more, buy the cute dress, the fancy gadget, the perfect home decor. But somewhere along the way, I started to feel... weighed down. Not just by the stuff itself, but by the constant cycle of wanting more, buying more, and then feeling the fleeting happiness fade, only to be replaced by the urge for the next thing.

In addition, things got worse with the rise of social media and social media influencers who stormed my feed and kept showing me new finds and cool products. So, I had to buy everything; the Stanley cup, the magnificent leggings for my Pilates workouts, the new face mist for my acne-prone skin, and the list goes on.

Does that resonate with you? If it does, then welcome! Let's grab a warm drink, maybe curl up on the sofa, and have a little chat about something I've been working on: learning how to "deinfluence" myself. It sounds a bit counterintuitive in our always-online world, doesn't it? But trust me, it's been a game-changer for finding a little more peace and a lot more room in my budget (and my closet!).

The Psychology Behind It: Why We Buy

It’s easy to blame social media, but the truth is, a lot of our purchasing habits are rooted in something deeper. We often buy things to fill a void. Maybe we feel lonely, so we buy new clothes to feel more appealing. Maybe we’re stressed, so we order a bunch of new stuff to get that little rush of a package arriving. Sometimes, we're seeking to fit in, to project an image of success, or to feel like we're "keeping up" with everyone else.

The deinfluencing journey starts when you pause and ask yourself what emotion you're really chasing. Is it happiness? Security? A sense of belonging? Once you identify the underlying feeling, you can find healthier, more sustainable ways to fulfill that need that don't involve your credit card. You can connect with a friend, go for a walk, or spend an hour on a creative project. It’s about replacing the temporary high of a purchase with the lasting satisfaction of a meaningful action. And how to do it? The following realistic ways helped me deinfluence myself and start being more considerate of my spending habits.

1. Unplug from the Noise

Think about your social media feed for a sec. How many perfectly curated lives are you scrolling through every day? How many "must-have" items are being dangled in front of you? It's not their fault, of course. But all that constant exposure can make you feel like your perfectly lovely life is somehow... lacking.

So, the first step for me was a little digital declutter. It wasn't drastic, no deleting apps cold turkey (baby steps, right?). Instead, I started being really intentional about who I was following. Anyone who consistently made me feel that pang of "I need that!" got the unfollow or mute button. Instead, I started seeking out accounts that inspired me in different ways –people sharing their hobbies, their creative projects, their cozy homes, without the constant promotion. It's amazing how much lighter your mental load feels when you're not constantly bombarded with the next big thing.

And honestly? Those little digital detoxes are pure bliss. Even just putting my phone on airplane mode for an hour or two in the evening feels like a mini-vacation for my brain.

2. Take a Beat Before You Buy

Remember that thrill of seeing something you just have to have? Our brains are wired for that little dopamine hit. But what if we just... paused? That's where my "waitlist" (which is literally just a note on my phone) comes in. When I see something tempting, I add it to the list, and then I make myself wait at least a week, sometimes a month. You'd be surprised how often that initial "OMG I NEED THIS NOW" feeling completely evaporates.

Then comes the gentle interrogation. Do I really need this? Or do I just want it because it's trendy? Do I have something similar lurking in the back of my closet? Will this actually make my life better, or will it just end up gathering dust? Asking myself these questions, like talking to a thoughtful friend, has saved me from so many impulse buys.

And you know what else? I've started "shopping my own closet" more. It sounds a bit cliché, but it's actually kind of fun! I've rediscovered clothes I forgot I had and found new ways to style old favorites. It feels so much more resourceful (and wallet-friendly!) than constantly buying new things.

3. Rethink Your Calendar and Your Cash

FOMO, or the "fear of missing out," is a beast. It's that nagging feeling that everyone else is out there having the time of their lives, and you're stuck at home. Of course, spending time with people you care about is a priceless part of a happy life. But so is the peace of mind that comes with being in control of your money. And sometimes, those two things can feel like they're at odds.

Lately, I’ve been trying to get a little pickier about what I say "yes" to. With all the invites to weekly happy hours, weekend trips, and just-for-fun classes, it's easy to get swept up in a packed social schedule that also drains your bank account. I've started asking myself a simple question: "How is this adding genuine value to my life?"

If that weekly volleyball league your friends are begging you to join costs $100 a month and makes your stomach churn just thinking about the expense, it's okay to say no. Prioritizing your financial health is not selfish; it’s one of the most powerful forms of self-care there is. The same goes for those everyday purchases. That new beauty serum everyone is raving about on their "Get Ready With Me" videos might look enticing, but when you stop and ask yourself what it's truly worth to you, you might find that it's not worth the $40 at all. Loud budgeting can help you as it has helped me as well.

This approach isn't about living a boring life. It's about shifting your mindset from "Can I afford this?" to "Is this truly worth my time and my money?" You are the boss of your calendar and your wallet. Saying no to an invitation—or a purchase—is one of the most powerful ways to take control and make room for what truly matters.

4. Finding Joy Beyond the Mall

This has been the biggest shift for me. I realized that the fleeting happiness I got from a new purchase wasn't really filling me up. So, I started focusing on things that actually do – spending time with loved ones, getting lost in a good book, going for walks in nature, even just making a really delicious meal.

Finding a hobby (or rediscovering an old one) has been huge too. For me, it's been getting back into cooking. When I'm focused on executing a recipe, the urge to consume just kind of fades away. It's like I'm filling that empty space with something meaningful instead of something material, which is a treat not only for me but for my loved ones as well.

The most important thing is to change your mindset about this whole "deinfluencing" thing. If you think of it as deprivation, it can be challenging. If you approach it as being more intentional, more mindful, and ultimately, more content with what you have, it is going to be liberating. Deinfluencing yourself is finding your own style and your own priorities, rather than chasing after the ever-shifting trends.

There are definitely days when I still get tempted. But the more I practice these little habits, the easier it gets to tune out the noise and tune into what truly brings me joy. And honestly, that feeling of freedom – the freedom from constant wanting – is way more satisfying than any shopping spree ever could be.